Can I get fries with that?

My uncle was taking a really long time picking up supper. He finally came home and insisted his daughter come with him because he figured his European accent was throwing off the person at the drive thru. They drive back to the drive thru and he started placing his order. Again, no response. He said, all frustrated, “See? They don’t understand me. They don’t even respond by saying anything!”
She looked at him like only a daughter can do, and said ” Sorry. They are never going to respond to you. It might be because you are trying to order your food from the garbage can”.
drive-thru drive-thru

Hey! Watch the hair!

I was in Vancouver on a business trip with a friend of mine. She has beautiful curly hair. She spent a few hour straightening it. At night, we decided to take advantage of the hot tub that was outside on the roof of the hotel. So posh. We went up there feeling so classy and sophisticated, nothing like our usual drab young mom role. I got in the warm water, looked up at the beautiful dusk sky, and then looked over at the mountains. My friend caught my eye as she sat there enjoying the view as well. In a shower cap! I busted out laughing, but quickly looked around in embarrassment to see if anyone spotted us. I said “what are you wearing?” She said matter of factly, as if I was the strange one, “A shower cap. No way was I going to have wasted having straightened my hair just to have it curl up in the hot tub! I need to look professional¬†tomorrow.”
article-0-18C8ADF0000005DC-121_634x765

Retired Police Dogs

I wonder how retired police dogs and the like adjust to retirement. Do they try to fill their time by going to lunch with friends or volunteering? Do they take up a hobby they enjoyed when they were young pups like fetch? Do they become all grumpy and mope around the house pushing people out of their favourite chair? Maybe they are constantly planning their next meal and getting the early bird specials (chasing the birds, not paying less for supper). Well thank you for your service, dogs, and I hope you rest and play. You deserve it. My hats off to you! No, give it back! I am not up to playing chase then tug of war with my hat. You are too mature for this. Stop it!
download (6)