I wonder how retired police dogs and the like adjust to retirement. Do they try to fill their time by going to lunch with friends or volunteering? Do they take up a hobby they enjoyed when they were young pups like fetch? Do they become all grumpy and mope around the house pushing people out of their favourite chair? Maybe they are constantly planning their next meal and getting the early bird specials (chasing the birds, not paying less for supper). Well thank you for your service, dogs, and I hope you rest and play. You deserve it. My hats off to you! No, give it back! I am not up to playing chase then tug of war with my hat. You are too mature for this. Stop it!
My dad worked all the time. He never did drugs. Or drank. But boy did he inadvertently get his 4 kids high. Doing child labour. Toxic glue in an un-air vented room a bit bigger than a closet. Had to cut tiny swatches of fabric to cardboard pages to make swatch books for his clothing business. It was a bonding experience to say the least. It sounds boring, but we never complained. Too busy laughing our heads off at nothing. To this day, him and my mom don’t realize how high we were. But my sisters and brother have very fond (and foggy) memories indeed. Maybe that’s why we all have such a strong work ethic.
Baby clothes with pockets crack me up. What can they put in them? Nothing. They have no control over their arms and hands. Proven anatomy fact you can look up. They keep flailing and hitting themselves by accident. Their hands come out of nowhere and they are too slow to get out of the way.
Hailey always places her earphones from her iPod on her teddy bear before she goes to school. So he has something to listen to during the day. Sometimes he likes to get his groove on, or just tune out the other stuffed animals when they are being too ridiculous for him. She understands. Admit it. How many of you leave the tv on for your dog? It is very considerate.
Like we say in Canada, that’s how we roll. We’re down with that. Street talk I’m sure your down with that — recognize. Except we do ours Feet over Head.
It should read winter salt not “Wintersault”.
Do you ever get the feeling you are being followed? Justin Bieber is following me! Not on Twitter. Helium balloon attached to my purse.
3 year old Emma was opening a present. She asked her mom, “what is this, mommy?” Her mom replied, “one minute, you are having wedgie issues I am fixing.” Her daughter then thought the Russian doll she was asking about was called a wedgie and kept calling it that from then on. I like it. Pass it on. One day you too may be lucky enough to get a wedgie as a present.
Lesson? Pay closer attention when asked a question by a child still in the learning phase. You can effect their vocabulary tremendously. Don’t take this responsibility lightly. Mess them up and embarrass them as much as possible. They will soon enough return the favor when teaching you the hip language of the day when they are teenagers.
If you’ll now excuse me, I need to go check “the Facebook” and attempt to crush some candy on it to beat my daughter’s high score. I think I’ll use the jaw breakers I never ate from Halloween. Hope the pieces don’t get stuck between my phone case and phone like last time. Her score is still way ahead of mine somehow. I can’t figure out why my score isn’t budging.