Tag Archives: Parenting

One Way to Swatch the Kids

My dad worked all the time. He never did drugs. Or drank. But boy did he inadvertently get his 4 kids high. Doing child labour. Toxic glue in an un-air vented room a bit bigger than a closet. Had to cut tiny swatches of fabric to cardboard pages to make swatch books for his clothing business. It was a bonding experience to say the least. It sounds boring, but we never complained. Too busy laughing our heads off at nothing. To this day, him and my mom don’t realize how high we were. But my sisters and brother have very fond (and foggy) memories indeed. Maybe that’s why we all have such a strong work ethic.

Baby Clothes

Baby clothes with pockets crack me up. What can they put in them? Nothing. They have no control over their arms and hands. Proven anatomy fact you can look up. They keep flailing and hitting themselves by accident. Their hands come out of nowhere and they are too slow to get out of the way.

It’s Penguin Cold

I think we all know how cold it’s been. I call it penguin cold. It seems inhumane to be walking dogs in this weather. Even if they are wearing cute sweaters and matching knit boots. It would make more sense in my mind if I were to be driving around seeing people walking their penguins. Ok, waddling their penguins. Too cute on their leash. Although if you get near a small snow mountain, the penguin could take off and want to slide down really fast. They look nonchalant all dressed up for the ball, but we all know inside they are speed demons and risk takers, what with their sliding off slopes and diving into freezing cold ice water. The visual of penguins on leashes still tickles. But I changed my mind already. Instead of leashes, they should be wearing ties to better match their tuxedos.

Entertainment for all

Hailey always places her earphones from her iPod on her teddy bear before she goes to school. So he has something to listen to during the day. Sometimes he likes to get his groove on, or just tune out the other stuffed animals when they are being too ridiculous for him. She understands. Admit it. How many of you leave the tv on for your dog? It is very considerate.

Vocabulary for the ages

3 year old Emma was opening a present. She asked her mom, “what is this, mommy?” Her mom replied, “one minute, you are having wedgie issues I am fixing.” Her daughter then thought the Russian doll she was asking about was called a wedgie and kept calling it that from then on. I like it. Pass it on. One day you too may be lucky enough to get a wedgie as a present.
Lesson? Pay closer attention when asked a question by a child still in the learning phase. You can effect their vocabulary tremendously. Don’t take this responsibility lightly. Mess them up and embarrass them as much as possible. They will soon enough return the favor when teaching you the hip language of the day when they are teenagers.
If you’ll now excuse me, I need to go check “the Facebook” and attempt to crush some candy on it to beat my daughter’s high score. I think I’ll use the jaw breakers I never ate from Halloween. Hope the pieces don’t get stuck between my phone case and phone like last time. Her score is still way ahead of mine somehow. I can’t figure out why my score isn’t budging.